Housing developments

If there’s anything that could turn a kid into one of those school shooters, it’s housing developments and their endless cul-de-sacs, rows of nearly identical facades, SUVs and Minivans, sidewalks and lawns. They have names like:

  • Pleasant Springs
  • Fairbrook
  • Northwood Crossing
  • Point Breeze
  • Westgrove Manor
  • Eastspring Village
  • Willow Grove
  • Northview
  • Lakeview Estates
  • Brookdale Heights

You can keep making these up by combining elements randomly. These places aren’t hard to find. You’ve probably been to at least one of them, maybe even grown up in one. If not,

  1. Open up Google maps and find some urban area on the East Coast or Midwest in the U.S. The D.C. Metro area and Ohio are particularly good contenders.
  2. Zoom in and pan around to the outskirts where you see roads that have a grid and cul-de-sac pattern; there should be a “bunch” of houses between larger arterial roads. Make sure the development has sidewalks–you don’t want it to be more than 20ish years old.
  3. Find one of those arterial roads and locate its primary intersection with the housing development. Bonus points if that road is named something parkway.
  4. Put the guy down and look for a sign at the intersection. It might have some rocks neatly arranged, maybe some flowers. The sign is probably set in a cursive or serif font.